Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Awkward, Mockward


Introducing our newest segment; Awkward/Mockward. Feeling a bit nostalgic for those Hot/Not Hot lists we lived by when we were twelve, we've decided to bring the sentiment back. Because they're are a whole hell of a lot of awkward things out there, but there are also a lot of less-awkward, kind of really-fucking-normal things that pose as awkward, too. We call these things Mockward. And while deciphering between truly awkward things and their not-so-awkward counterparts can be tough, we'll make the process a bit easier by coming up with succinct lists in which we deem things 'awkward' or 'mockward.'

AWKWARD/MOCKWARD

Welcome to the Dollhouse/Juno
Intrepretative Dancing/Rabbit Dancing
Robert Downey Jr/Zach Braff
Hillary Clinton/Barrack Obama
Cleats/Crocs
Francis Bacon/Basquiat
San Francisco/New York City
Henry Miller/Chuck Pahlinick
Strangers With Candy/ Flight of the Conchords
Cassette Tape/Vinyl
Bob Saget/Sarah Silverman
Bowl-Cut/Mullets
Old Man Beard/Moustache
Las Vegas' Lance Burton/A&E's Criss Angel MindFreak
Mama Cass's Ham Sandwich Death/ Elliot Smith's Knife-Through-The-Heart Death
Soccer Mom Jeans/High-Waist Jeans
E-Harmony/MySpace
Cancer/Drug Addiction
Wesley Willis/Conor Oberst (of Bright Eyes)
Epilepsy/ODing
O'Douls/PBR
Naming your child Dweezer (Frank Zappa)/Naming your child Pilot Inspektor (Jason Lee)
NAMBLA/PETA
Pale Fire by Nobokov/ Franny & Zooey by Salinger

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Perez Hilton's blog/Onward Awkward! blog

The Third Alternative said...

touche, anonymous commenter man. touche. but too bad perez is completely mockward...maybe if you would have said paris hilton's blog...I'd imagine that's actually very very scary and very genuinely awkward.